Athena Hohenberg, the Nutella Nitwit, Sues Nutella for Not Being Healthy

Athena Hohenberg, you are a twit and everything that is wrong with this country. And shame on you for smearing the name of Nutella; the very delicious spread that myself and fellow Pinterest pinners alike put in just about everything?

If you have not heard by now, Athena Hohenerg, AKA the Nutella Nazi, brought a class-action lawsuit against these chocolate-hazelnut angels because they tricked her delicate dumb-as-bricks mind into believing that Nutella was good for children.

Nutella’s parent company Ferrero USA, Inc. has been ordered to cough-up over $3 million, with over $2 million to be given to consumers who file a claim. According to the New York Daily News:

As part of the settlement, anyone in the U.S. who purchased Nutella between January 1, 2008 and February 3, 2012 (or for Calif. residents between August 1, 2009 and January 23, 2012) can file a claim. People can claim their purchases until July 5, 2012 and expect $4 for a single purchase and up to 5 jars for a maximum award of $20 per household.

Apparently Miss Hohenberg decided on a class-action lawsuit against the Nutella makers because she saw an advertisement that implied that Nutella should be incorporated as part of a healthy breakfast, but then was horrified to learn that, in fact, it was (gasp) a sugary chocolate spread. Unfortunately she found this out after she had been dosing her kid with a daily breakfast consisting of Nutella. Apparently she lacked the intelligence to, uh, I don’t know, turn over the jar and read the ingredients label.

And this twit is parenting a child?

Well this is one Californian who is not only going to decline my right to a Nutella claim, but I will buy MORE! Because I love you Nutella, and all of your chocolatey, hazelnut-y, sugary goodness. You will adorn my cupcakes, grace my pancakes, and when I am PMS’ing, be shoveled into my mouth full-bore like the antidote to aging. VIVA LA NUTELLA! NUTELLA STRONG!


4 thoughts on “Athena Hohenberg, the Nutella Nitwit, Sues Nutella for Not Being Healthy

  1. Good article. Athena Hohenberg is a NUTCASE.

    Nutella and Europe should sue her for damaging the company’s name and reputation. Consider her name, Athena Hohenberg, Her name sounds very European to me. Seriously, Nutella in Europe is like peanut butter here in the USA. Everyone there knows its great with fruit and fruit is healthy. But nobody in Europe is stupid enough to beleive that Nutella alone is as healthy as fruit. But rather a great way to get your children to eat fruit and get some nutrition. Better than a candy bar without fruit. Therefore one reason she needs to be sued, likely she is from or has a European background (Nutella should check this out) and if so she is using California sue happy, to make some gain or just damage the reputation of the company. Come on, she already knew about Nutella from Europe. Did she ever travel or live there? She knows. She needs to be sued!

    California should also sue her for her stupidity and for the stupidity of her children who will eventually need public services due to her inability to model positive and a healthy role model for her children.

  2. Of course everyone should do their due diligence and read the ingredients, but does the ingredient list give food sellers carte blanche to engage in deceptive marketing? of course not. shame on the mom for feeding something to her kid based on a television ad that marketed candy like it was healthy. shame on ferrero for runing the ad.

  3. “Mom, can I use Nutella for breakfast?”
    “Sure honey, the ADS say that it’s HEALTHY. We’re safe cause the ADS SAYS SO.”

    We need law to ensure customer to be intelligent, not spoon-feed their safety. They don’t have to be rocket scientist, just enough to realize that sugar-filled/blended chocolate are never a health food.

The box below is for thought ejaculation. Think safely.

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