Forget Grilled Cheese Jesus, Behold Shower Penis

You will not believe what happened to me tonight. I was taking a shower and stuck some loose hair on the shower wall like girls tend to do, and when I was rinsing out my conditioner I glanced over and saw this:

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IT’S A FREAKING SHOWER PENIS!

It must be a phallic message from a powerful penile spirit.

I swear to penis this is exactly what I saw. For once, I can honestly say, I did not manipulate this penis in any way.

This is so much better than Jesus in a sandwich, or Elvis in a piece of wood, or Mary in a dog’s butt.

I was going to wash it away, but what if people want to come test its authenticity, or line up to take pictures with Shower Penis?

I was so excited that I dragged Calm-ass Husband out of bed to see it. He isn’t nearly as amused by it as I am.

I just wish I knew what it was trying to tell me. What does it mean???

Update:

As quickly as it came, Shower Penis went. By my shower this morning, all that remains is the tip. Just the tip.

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Shower Penis stays around long enough to inspire, but not be taken for granted.

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2 thoughts on “Forget Grilled Cheese Jesus, Behold Shower Penis

  1. The reason the Calm-ass Husband was not amused is that he is now afraid that you are not just seeing penises in unusual places but probably creating them.

    I doubt if someone will pay you even a penny for the tiles with the hair penis, but you could try eBay; people sell the weirdest shit there.

    • I swear to Shower Penis, I did not make it. I was going over how I usually swipe when I have hair on my hands, and I stick it on there and tend to swipe up and then being my hand down quickly in a downward motion to get the wet hair off. That being said, I’ll probably never be able to recreate that naturally again in my lifetime. And I would never sell Shower Penis, that would just insult it. That and, by my next shower, it was gone.

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